a vision of timeless existence.

There are things in the world that die. Like the plants I abandoned on my vacation (though I’m trying to resurrect them!) or “Mickey” my childhood pet. Parents split up and children move out. Everyday I grow older (5 months till my 22nd b-day) and thus near closer to death! Catch my drift? Change is a given. And this has been on my heart for the last couple of weeks.

While on vacation in seemingly paradise, I received a call from my sister and mom from Canada. I was in Bocas Del Toro wishing I was in Canada. Then entering on the highway going home, things felt odd. The new “family” Laura and I acquired during our stay and amazing moments flashed through my mind. I was driving into Panama wishing I was still in Bocas. Now I sit here in my apartment, knowing that in a few short months I’ll be in Canada wishing I was back in Panama. Change can be really difficult. Difficulties are inevitable.

This world is full of stuff that I just don’t like: heartbreaks, funerals, airport goodbyes, insecurities and unknowns. Yesterday after I sat down exhausted from work (next week is frosh week on campus!) and all I longed to do was seek God. I felt sadness in my heart about the future and a deep burden for Laura and some fears/spiritual darkness she’d been experiencing. So last night, Laura and I went to Casa de Oración (my church) ready to hear from God. During the service Laura and I started praying simultaneously for each other, praying through pains foreseen in saying goodbye again in 5 months (early, I know) and all that was on our hearts. Though amidst my worried prayers, God silenced me with a breath of heaven.

I saw a girl…full of joy and freedom…playing in a green field-like area. It looked like bliss, pure delight, everything radiated…it was beautiful. Tears flooded as the picture zoomed out, exposing a path through the beauty that surrounded ME! God showed me just a glimpse of how He sees things. My body is physically home on this earth but my spirit lives in that place with God, eternally. And as the vision expanded, so my tears continued to burst, revealing Laura by my side in that place with God. And as we continued on the path, so we grew and the journey still continues. This whole Blog entry might be a little heavy for some of you, but this moment yesterday really has made a mark on my life. How come? Well, first of all…I’d never had such a vivid vision from God, and second my viewpoint has expanded GI-normously! In Laura’s words, this life is a “road-trip.” I’m wearing eternal glasses now, cause everything in this world isn’t really it. Things change. I’m not physically where my spirit lives, cause that place is eternal. And my God is unchanging.

“My life is no longer than the width of my hand. An entire lifetime is just a moment to you; human existence is but a breath. We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing.” Psalm 39:5-6